Search

Laurie Markvart's Diary

Tag

#music

Raw Blog Audio Companion – Have a listen!

I can’t tell if I was excited last night because I was seeing a rock ‘n’ roll band, Cheap Trick, I’ve loved for a very, very long time, in a setting as intimate as the Troubadour, or because I was with two of my good friends I’ve known since the 80s. We’ve bounced around cities together for decades and somehow ended up in the same one. I’m just so blessed. They’re my brothers, really. As a matter of fact, one of my buddies and I were in our first rock band together, as teenagers in the 80s. That’s how far back we go. And we probably even covered a Cheap Trick song.

Cheap Trick added a show at the Troubadour last minute. My buddies texted to come to the show. I had that brief hesitation — oh, I don’t want to fight traffic on a weeknight, drive from Pasadena to West Hollywood, blah blah blah. Then I thought about the recent tragic passing of Irish musician Glen Hansard, who was my age and such a profound influence on my music when I first discovered him through The Swell Season and The Frames, back in the early 2000s. The point is that we never know how long we’ll have our friends. We never know how long we’ll be here. I know that sounds dramatic, and everyone says some version of “live today, you don’t know about tomorrow.” But I also thought, Cheap Trick are a great band, and these dudes aren’t young anymore, and hell, I don’t know how much longer they’ll be able to play. Glen’s passing really made me rethink how important it is to just say fuck it. Go. It doesn’t matter the cost, the location, what you must wake up for in the morning. Just go.

And my God, I’m so glad I did. It was one of the most fun shows I’ve been to. Me and my buds, crackin’ beers, and part of me thought, I shouldn’t drink on a weeknight. That’s bullshit too. It was fun. Of course, we all have limits. But a limit shouldn’t become an excuse to not go.

There was a point I almost cried during one of the songs — “Surrender,” and oh, how fitting that song was to the whole experience. Not just to surrender to the moment, but to take notice of the age gaps in that room, as well as the gap between the first time I ever saw Cheap Trick live in the 80s and now. I wrote a memoir about music that came out in 2022 called “Somewhere in the Music, I’ll Find Me”. Yes, I’m plugging my book. Maybe it’s like in my book, how that first rock ‘n’ roll show I saw started this massive desire in me for rock music, and the Cheap Trick show reminded me, all these years later, that it’s still a big part of my life. It’s still something I get to do. Maybe it was because at this show I was fully sweaty, happily stuck in a tight crowd for 90 minutes, was intimate with every single person around me — not in the kissing sense, though we’re close enough, and I think I got felt up, and I probably felt up a couple other people too, because that’s what happens in a rock show audience. There’s no malice intent behind it. Bodies rub off bodies. But there was this respect in the room for the band on stage, and for each of us. I looked around and saw young people in their twenties, people my age, people many years older, and we were all just feeling it together. Many of us had fallen in love with this band as kids, and look how much we’ve all changed, how many lessons we’ve carried with us, and here we all were, packed into a sold-out Troubadour.

One of the songs took me straight back to the 80s, flooded me with memories of being a teenage girl, fun, loving, silly, devoted to being a musician and with something to prove. And here I am now, a woman, feeling that same excitement for the future, that same energy, still with something to prove. I’m so glad I said what the fuck, I’m going to the Troubadour.

I’m sure I stunk when I left. I was sticky, there was beer spilled on me at some point, sweaty beyond belief. Normally, I’m repulsed by sweat, but there’s nothing better than sweat in a rock bar. And there is no reason to complain ‘cause back in the day we’d also be covered in cigarette smoke. When I used to be on stage, fronting a heavy metal band back in the 90s, the second I started sweating, I knew the show had really begun. I’d leave the stage so drenched I could wring my clothes out, and sometimes it wasn’t even my sweat. It was everyone else’s, on me, and that’s fucking glorious.

I hadn’t been packed that tight into a crowd for a rock show in a long time, and somewhere in the middle of it I found myself thinking about the pandemic and how nobody really brings it up anymore, and yet there I was, remembering exactly what it felt like back in 2020 to wonder if we’d ever get to do this again. Surprised myself with that one.

So go live your life. I haven’t fully, for a long time. I’ve hunkered down, gotten anxious about this or that, some of it was put onto me, but honestly the anxiety is ridiculous. A rock show in the middle of the week with your buddies? Nothing beats that for me. And apparently for the other 300 people in attendance. They needed for themselves too.

I’m not saying abandon your wellbeing or health. God knows I’d never say that, considering what I’ve been through. But have that slice of bacon, have a drink, enjoy that cigarette. Believe me, I’m sure most of the audience last night is on a statin. EMS was posted stage side too. I’m not sure if it was for the band or for all of us with AARP cards, but it’s nice to know we had backup.

Go get sweaty because tomorrow you’ll probably put yourself right back on notice. And we must live. We’re still here.

Thank you, Glenn Hansard for all that you have done musically, inspirationally, and in this minor way, reminding a girl to keep going on.

©️ 2026 Laurie Markvart

 

“HOW” Lyrics for Lovers and Those Who Are Done

Hello Friends,

Here are lyrics to a new song I’ll post to Youtube within the coming weeks. If the words resonate with you then embrace them. You’re not alone.

X,
L

HOW

How do I say I’m sorry
When I’m not sure I’m wrong
How do I fix broken glass
With shards that are gone.

How do I relapse into a love
That has been drunk dry
How do I care about a story
When a sigh become a lie.

How is it here, we became this
Broken in two, no longer fit
How many times did we try to make it right?
Not enough, not enough
’cause we’re here.

How the hell does ambition
Turn to regret
And trust to lust
For another to get.

How does intention
Become a memory
And purity to anger
It’s all I see.

Lyrics ©lauriemarkvart 2017

 

Quotes, Thoughts, and Notes

Below are things I’ve said, wrote or sang. A few may be from my memoir. Query me if you desperately(!) need to know which ones. And yes, this is a picture I took. We should all at some point drink wine in a tin coffee cup while watching a tremendous sunset – February 2017. Malibu.

I’m providing these quotes below because sometimes shared words help others. 

Feel free to share if they interest you. Especially the last one considering today:

“It’s the way you look at me, piercing love astray.”

“How do I say I’m sorry when I’m not sure I’m wrong.”

“I feel your touch, I hear your sigh and you’re not even here.”

“But, he is the alpha, I know she will not debate him. At least not in front of me. But I’ll take him on. One last time.”

“Make sure you’re not running from something that leads you to nothing.”

“I hate to knock anything, although it’s such a bore.”

“There’s never been a question of my faith, it runs deep when I see you.”

“Most of the time I would listen to music, practice music, escape into music.”

“I never thought I’d struggle to say such tempting words.”

“I’ve got to believe in something to get me through this, some glorious forgiving fate that’s unexpectedly true.”

©Laurie Markvart

 

 

 

 

 

When I’m Not Writing, I’m Singing, and I’m Doing It in Front of People This Sunday!

When I’m not writing, or blogging, or talking, or thinking, or bs’n…I’m singing.  And I’m singing this Sunday, April 23, 7:30pm at Bar Lubitsch. You can buy advance tickets here (suggested):

https://www.eventbrite.com/e/laurie-markvart-unplugged-tickets-33743184774

Until then…here’s a taste of the lyrics from the song GIVE ME ALL that will start the show. The song can also be purchased on iTunes if you want to get a listen before Sunday.

Hope to see you there. Cheers!

Always close to nothing
But closer than before
I hate to knock anything
Although it’s such a bore

To forgo any love
To trade for some luck
Hoping for tomorrow
I will not be so stuck
Trivial little happiness
At my finger tips

(©) lauriemarkvart

“Should I Stay” – Lyrical Poem for the Day

Today, I’m sharing poetic lyrics of memory. Not sure when I’ll set the music but when that flows, I will.  If it doesn’t, then it’s just a poem.

My muse-in the past. Gone. But I still look for her. The needs of a daughter do not disappear with the departed. Nor do the issues of why she drove me crazy or why I loved her so much.

Today, poetic lyrics. Getting it out, letting it flow and being in THIS moment. Someday, acceptance. Just not today. And that is okay ’cause I can’t go back, and I certainly can’t jump forward. And sorry to say, this applies to all of us. Unless you have a time machine. And if you do, DM me. I’d love to hear about it. xo

#bepresent, #beintheflow, #beinthemoment

Should I stay
 Should I walk away
 Does it pay to know how you feel

Should I stay
 Should I lie down next to you
 Cry for a while

Memories, you and me
 Blanket my mind
 Tell me I should run, hide

But I look at you
 And I see what you do
 And I know for now, I’ll stay

Should I stay
 Give us another day
 I can’t breathe for you

Should I stay
 Give it more time to play
 In my head, broken, astray 
 But today, I’ll stay

©Laurie Markvart

Create a website or blog at WordPress.com

Up ↑