She’s almost gone,
Won’t return,
She’s my Devil card,
Tower moment, burn.
That bitch never did good,
Only sorrow, sleaze,
Unease, no sleep
Spirit broke, tease.
Tricked me, lost me,
Confused me, bust me,
Survived her, still taste her,
Red rim, toxic shit,
Grip it, slip it, blur.
Pop that cork,
Resonate the room,
No foolish downgrade,
My past, gloom.
Kiss my future,
You’re not a loss.
I finally did see,
Off the sauce.
©️2026 Laurie Markvart
Sit. Sit within.
Do nothing. Do everything.
Go places. Go nowhere.
Breathe. Just smile.
Find joy. Find quiet.
Scream! Love. Laugh.
Truth. Believe.
It’s me, right? Yes.
It’s you, right? no?
It’s only all that is me.
My perspective. My script.
Live.
Sound hurts my ears.
Light hurts my eyes.
Love hurts my heart.
I try to see beyond.
I am alone, I am together.
I am you, me, us, nothing.
© March 2026 Laurie Markvart
That’s a lot of space,
For an empty heart,
To fill a room that was torn apart.
How do you do it?
Stay around with aches and disregarded sound.
Beaten, but a trusted mind you’d say.
That’s a lie.
There is not always another day.
I’m going to leave,
And enjoy the show,
The never-ending need to grow and love a different soul.
I think you should care to help yourself,
You’re aware.
Fix that massive hole in your heart,
It’s only the start.
This morning I was going through old notebooks and journals, which I have many, where I scribble and scrabble thoughts, poems, songs, commentary about bills, ideas for a book, etc. (I should probably separate my thoughts from my bills and put into different books!)
The above poem I wrote at some point in 2023. I love stumbling on old poems cause it gives me insight to something I was going through at the time. Journals are definitely an emotional time capsule!
And while this poem was me blasting a thought to paper, ‘cause I can tell by my messy handwriting that I wrote it in one take, I don’t want to now tweak or edit it for a “better” poetic outcome because then it means I’m tweaking a memory. But I did change two words before posting this. Just to make a rhyme. (Eye rolling)
Have you ever looked back at old notes or journals to see where your mind and heart was? And then realize that you have grown so intensely?
Let me know.
X, L
©️Laurie Markvart 2025
You and Me
I’m in the wings,
But I need center stage.
I want the light,
But there’s comfort in the rage.
I could never tell,
Where I’d land.
But then came me,
Fading somewhere in you, convincedly.
I must fall back into me,
To get the love from you.
But I’ll leave you, maybe I’m gone,
Don’t shelve me, forget me; damn that’s another song.
A touch, a whisper,
No complaint.
A never-ending answer,
To my restraint.
© Laurie Markvart 2025
It Was All You
I constantly think of you.
Obsessed.
Like a bear after a fish,
A bird after a worm,
A song in search of a voice.
The first sight of you,
My intuition was so full I thought I’d faint.
It told me everything that trapped my heart.
In one second, it was all you.
I am sure of your importance to me,
This good fortune.
My spirit knows the story,
Perhaps it knows its end.
I’ll go on, not knowing now or ever.
But to trust is a course for truth.
I must leave it all to fate,
Just like the first and last time we met,
Now, only to wonder of my importance to you.
© 2024 Laurie Markvart
Sometimes, I wonder if you realize I’m here.
Do you ever think I’m the answer to your prayer?
Your indifference to my appearance is rare.
So here I stand in front of the promised one,
The guy with all the luck and then some.
How does it feel to have all the fortune in the world?
And yet to be completely broke?
Don’t you want to know why I’m here?
Don’t you want to know why I care?
Cause look again, I’m not transparent like you.
I figure you don’t notice anything at all,
Your eyes turned to gold a long time ago.
And the image you paint yourself is thin.
When I ask the father why I’m sent to you,
He says you have a lot of harm to undue.
So, I ask again, how does it feel?
To have all the fortune in the world?
And yet to be completely broke?
Don’t you want to know why I’m here?
Don’t you want to know why I care?
Look again, I’m not transparent like you.
© 1999 Laurie Markvart from the song “Transparent” for the band Stepfoot
I haven’t written a poem in three years. I’ve written song lyrics but not a poem for the sake of being just that. A poem. Words that rhyme and tell a story and take a heart somewhere. And yet poetry was my first love, even before music. So, welcome back the words and the joy.
Isn’t it stunning when we change our whereabouts, silence our racing mind, and let our muse come alive again? What is yours?
So, here on the island of Kauai, Hawaii, on a mini-vacation, I brought my journal/notebook/songbook/idea planner, lol, you get it – papers that are bound together for potential words, and out came a poem. I was staring at the stunning ocean, and the words came. Words had been vacant, but they arrived with the salt-dabbed winds of the Pacific:
Inspiration comes from nowhere,
© 2023 Laurie Markvart
And yet everywhere.
The browning of a leaf’s end,
The flowering of a dare.
The start of something new,
The ending of a flame.
Troubled thoughts that escape,
Feelings of love that remain.
Knowing when it’s done,
Believing love is not to be won.
Trials, passings, how time endures,
Facing our misgivings but reality cures.
Inspired by a breath to have, don’t forget.
No time travel back, no regret.
Faith in a future that’s yet to give,
A heart left open, time to live.
Hello Friends,
Here are lyrics to a new song I’ll post to Youtube within the coming weeks. If the words resonate with you then embrace them. You’re not alone.
X,
L
How do I say I’m sorry
When I’m not sure I’m wrong
How do I fix broken glass
With shards that are gone.
How do I relapse into a love
That has been drunk dry
How do I care about a story
When a sigh become a lie.
How is it here, we became this
Broken in two, no longer fit
How many times did we try to make it right?
Not enough, not enough
’cause we’re here.
How the hell does ambition
Turn to regret
And trust to lust
For another to get.
How does intention
Become a memory
And purity to anger
It’s all I see.
Laurie Markvart's Diary 